Teen Mom’s Tyler Baltierra is coming to the defense of his wife Catelynn Lowell, who’s been getting backlash for comments she made about her daughter Carly’s adoptive parents.

“Adoption is wild...Being at the mercy of someone that can say no...I know I chose this, there’s no need to tell me,” Catelynn wrote on her Instagram Story, per People. “I will just never understand how you say that you ‘love’ us and will always be ‘blessed’ for us...BUT you can’t take TWO days out of your entire year to just meet up for dinner and do a park or something small? Especially when we said we would travel to YALL?! I know for me...people I LOVE and are blessed to have, I MAKE time for! So now we most likely won’t see her until she’s 16...And who knows if that will even happen…”

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Catelynn’s comments drew some strong opinions from fans, prompting Tyler to defend her.

“Carly is almost 15 years old. Throughout those 15 years, her parents have chosen not to have our (mutually agreed upon) annual visit, MULTIPLE times!” Tyler reportedly explained, adding, “We can waste our time asking questions, dissecting responses and begging for an answer...but we are NOT entitled to it (regardless of how much we may believe/wish otherwise). All we can do is accept the decision without the requirement of an answer.”

The reality star went on to say how difficult the situation is for Catelynn, writing, “Most will never know the pain of what it takes to fight against the most powerful, biological and instinctual nature that’s required to make that choice.”

“There’s no guessing,” he added. “There’s no false hope, and there’s nothing you can do to bring them back or change it. But grieving your child while they still live is truly an unexplainable pain in so many ways, I won’t even attempt to put it into words.”

Going on to defend Catelynn, Tyler said in part, “With that pain, inevitable, comes emotional reactions and expressions. My wife fights this pain every day. Some days are a victory and some days are not. But her expressing that pain on those particular days when she is vulnerable, sad, and at a loss, should not be used as an attack against her character.”

Tyler added that he’s aware “assumptions, criticism, and judgments are all part of the territory” when you’re famous but noted, “We’re only human after all and I believe we all could use some more grace and understanding towards one another!”

A reminder that Tyler and Catelynn placed Carly in an open adoption in 2009, a decision that was chronicled on 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom. They’ve gone on to have three additional children: Rya, Vaeda, and Novalee.