There exists no truer test of a man’s character than FAMILY. Not war nor competition. . .but family.
For it is in the corner and context of his home kitchen that a man truly walks through fire, vicious daggers, and flying saucers. Where his struggles and demons are brought to the fore, where he is shoved to the edge of sanity.
Nothing is more effective and efficient in revealing mettle and fortitude.
Family tests the grit of every man.
With not much thanks, he not only shovels food to ever hungrier mouths but also navigate a small tribe through fire & flood, Chanel & Gucci, barf & piss, boyfriends & ex-boyfriends, preschool & college. . . and everything in between.
God bless him!
Caught between the demands of family and career — two worlds jealous of the attention paid to the other — he holds office memos on one hand and drawings of rainbows on the other.
You have a man masterful and competent at work. . .clueless at home, realizing that all that management training turns to dust once he’s become a glorified dog-walker.
He tackles the idiosyncratic needs of a “band of bothers” — hooking up the flat screen, promoting experimental plumbing, taking out the trash (okay, sometimes), and ensuring that everyone is up to speed socially, psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Before our first insignificant paychecks, everything was on the house. We owe practically everything — from clothes to car, to every meal eaten, including every bottle of beer — to a Family Man.
He who is the firm voice, the strong arm, the leader — leading a little bunch of truly ungrateful characters through life, teaching them its lessons, providing inspiration, vision, supporting dreams, and doing everything in his power to give them the life he never had.
All this he does. . .hopefully without extinguishing himself in the process. His is a position with no hope of a promotion, but his role is as crucial as the color red on Valentine’s Day.
Evidently, more than just being its litmus test, the family is also the sculptor of character. Every minute of being a father and a husband is character-building — the lessons of which, would make a run-of-the-mill fiancé or boyfriend run for dear life.
Imagine being a first-time father, driving to the hospital in the middle of the night, with a car almost on ‘empty’, with your hysterical wife and unconscious child in the backseat.
At no other time can great men feel so helpless. Imagine going to the grocery store with your boy, dodging the ‘candy aisles’, because the times have made you defensive about your $1.99 .
Imagine sleeping next to your wife, when you don’t know where half of next month’s mortgage payment will come from.
So, in spite of the criticisms hurled against delinquent men, and the wonderful job women are doing at home, there will always be a seat most especially reserved for a man. (Besides, mothers can’t be trusted to teach a mean jump shot.)
His absence creates a ‘hole’ more profound than that suffered by the ozone layer. A hole specifically cut and curved in the shape of a father, and a husband.
The bearded one — he’ll fill the home with cool silence when everybody else is screaming.
So in the tradition of John Catoir’s ‘The World Needs Men’, I add that the world needs Family Men. Men who don’t run, but stand their ground. Men whose vested interest is in the Home. Men who’ll step up, rise up, and man up:
The World Needs Family Men
Who will remember to take out the trash.
Who will pick the right detergent at the grocery store
Who will learn to love their mothers-in-law. . .eventually.
Who isn’t afraid to ask for directions, and have the mental capacity to follow them. . . accurately.
Who lie at lot less, than when they were bachelors.
Who will sit through Ophrah, even when they’ve got no clue
Who can shut up without shutting off.
Who knows that having fun is more important than having a vacation go perfectly.
Who can be strong, but who can also let it slide.
Who only shouts, when it’s a cheer for Johnny.
Who knows the perfect way to hold a baby. . .close to his heart
Who can wipe a tear. . .his own.
God knows, the world is desperate for such.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
What Does Being in Love and Loving Someone Really Mean? | My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me | The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex | The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence |
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