- Dolly Parton, 73, opened up about a dark time in her life on Jad Abumrad's new podcast, Dolly Parton's America.
- Parton said she was under a lot of stress and contemplated suicide, but her faith saved her.
- Dolly Parton's America, out on Tuesday, is a nine-part podcast series dedicated to the American icon and her legacy.
Episode one of Jad Abumrad's nine-part podcast Dolly Parton's America kicked off on Tuesday, and Dolly Parton shared a vulnerable moment in her life when she contemplated suicide.
“I got overweight and I was going through the change of life, I was having a lot female problems, I’d been going through a whole lot of family things, just the stress, the heartache," she said on the podcast, per Today. "There was just several things going on at that time. I was just broken down.”
While Parton did not elaborate more on her health problems at the time, the country star had to cancel a tour in 1982 due to abdominal pain and bleeding. In 1984, she had a partial hysterectomy and was told she would never be able to have children, which led to depression. She also struggled with binge eating and had an emotional affair.
“Sometimes God just has to smack you down,” Parton told Closer Weekly. “He was almost saying, ‘Sit your pretty little ass down because we have to deal with some stuff!’” Parton turned to her faith and began to "argue with God," she told Abumrad.
“I just said things like, ‘Look this is ridiculous, I am not happy,’ [and] arguing about why when they say you shouldn’t commit suicide because that’s a sin you can’t get forgiven for,” she said. “Everything was just confusing to me and I was just angry and I was hurt, and I was unhappy, and so I just said ‘You’re going to have to get me some answers or I’m getting out of here. And then we’ll both deal with it.’”
During a low moment, Parton's dog Popeye leaped onto her bed, "'bout the time I was writing my—you know,” she said. "God is dog spelled backwards, and I always thought that might have been the very thing.”
Ultimately, Parton survived the experience, but she told the Mirror that she has to be "wary" of depression, which runs in her family. “It’s usually brought on by something that’s going on in the family and if there are problems sometimes it’s a lot for one little person to carry.”
“People are always saying to me I’m happy all the time,” she said. “But nobody is happy all the time. I am a tender-hearted person and I feel everything to the ninth degree. Every once in a while I just feel you know... sad-hearted and melancholy."
Parton believes that the experience made her stronger. “After that I was twice the person I ever was,” she told The Mirror. “It was good for me. I didn’t drink or get on drugs but I saw where you could. I saw how people could get depressed enough to kill yourself."
At 73, the American icon is confident in who she is today, even though others have tried to bring her down, especially over her appearance.
"I figured if my work was truly good enough, people would eventually recognize that,” she recently told Elle. “It was about me knowing who I was, being happy with me, and feeling comfortable in the way I presented myself. If I was happy, I could make other people happy."
"That’s how I’ve always looked at it: that I look totally artificial, but I am totally real, as a writer, as a professional, as a human being," she continued. "A rhinestone shines just as good as a diamond.”
She also told People that she worries about young girls who aspire to look like models. "We need to be accepting of ourselves in how we are," she said.
The remaining episodes of Dolly Parton's America will explore her music, personal life, and legacy. Guest stars will include Jane Fonda, Gloria Steinem, and her nephew Bryan Seaver.
If you or someone you know needs help, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
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Currently an assistant editor at Prevention.com, Nicol is a Manhattan-based journalist who specializes in health, wellness, beauty, fashion, business, and lifestyle. Her work has appeared in Women’s Health, Good Housekeeping, Woman’s Day, Houston Chronicle, Business Insider, INSIDER, Everyday Health, and more. When Nicol isn't writing, she loves trying new workout classes, testing out the latest face mask, and traveling. Follow her on Instagram for the latest on health, wellness, and lifestyle.
